The riskiest moment in online dating isn't matching — it's meeting in person for the first time. Here's a 10-item checklist that takes 15 minutes and dramatically lowers your risk without making you paranoid.

Before the date

  1. Video call first. 10 minutes is enough to confirm they're a real person who looks like their photos.
  2. Reverse image search their photos. 30 seconds. Google Images + TinEye.
  3. Search their name + city. LinkedIn, Instagram, Facebook. Verifying their job and that they exist.
  4. Tell a friend. Share their name, photo, and where you're meeting. Many people share live location during the date via Find My or Life360.
  5. Plan your own transportation. Drive or take your own taxi — don't get picked up.

Picking the venue

  1. Public, busy, daytime if possible. Coffee or a drink, not dinner. Crowded means safer.
  2. Somewhere you know. Familiar terrain means you know the exits and how to get home.
  3. Avoid their place or yours on date 1. Even if it's "just to grab a drink first" — public place, always.

During and after

  1. Set a check-in. Text a friend at a fixed time during the date. The X-Plan or similar code-word systems work well.
  2. Trust your gut and leave if it's off. "I have an early morning" is a complete sentence.

What not to share on date 1

  • Your home address (have them drop you near home, not at home).
  • Your full work details (employer + role together = stalkable).
  • Drinks past your limit. One drink, max two.

The privacy layer most checklists miss

Most safety checklists assume your photo is already out there. The structural improvement: don't put your face on a public profile in the first place. Avatar-first dating means screenshots from your dating profile can't be reverse-searched against your LinkedIn — your face stays yours until you choose to share it after the video call.

Date safer from the start. Try Flazle — avatar profiles, real conversations, your face on your terms.